i hate myself for being unreasonable. wts is wrong with me? SIM LEE YUN, wake up pls!!!
**was reading through the fanfics and stories i've read and saved over the times. will be posting and sharing some of those i loved.
DOLCE VITA
I met her on the net, how?
I can't remember. but it seems to me that it is this 'little theory'
which I declared in the cyberspace that caught her attention.
If I have a million dollars, I would buy a house. do I have a million?
No.
that's why I don't have a house.
If I have wings, I can fly. do I have wings? No. so I can never fly.
If all the waters are drawn out of Pacific Ocean, but it still can't
put off the flame of love between us. Can all the waters of Pacific Ocean
be drawn off? No. That's why I don't love you.
That's me, a typical science student. First you come up with an
assumption, then you fit a suitable conclusion.
If the proposed assumption doesn't stand at all, then everything is
just bullshit. I guess this is what they call 'unromantic'.
But she is an exception. she actually mailed me and said that I am an
interesting' person.
'Interesting'? What a word to use on me, it's like using 'faithful' on
Mr. Clinton. I thought this girl must be a low-IQ organism, or
suffering from serious brain damage.
Anyway, her nick doesn't seems so bad -FLYINDANCE- that's quite a
unique one.
But I was warning myself: hello, this is the virtual world of Internet.
who knows what might be lurking behind a beautiful nick.
Talking from experience, most of the time it will be a 'dinosaur' in
disguise. The only differences will be whether it is a carnivore or a
herbivore but, I know she is way different from a 'dinosaur', she is
special ....
So I guess its time for the appearance of FlyNDance.
Ever since she mailed to tell me that I am 'interesting', I was always
wishing to meet her in AJCRR. Too bad, lady luck was just not on my
side. So I can only reply her letter to tell her that I will start to
train myself to become an 'interesting' person, just to show that she is
far-sighted.
She replied my reply, I replied her reply to my reply, she again
replied my reply to her reply blah blah blah... Oh no, I just started a
chain-reaction.
Actually what interested me the most is this paragraph she wrote in one
of the mails....
'I dance swiftly, amidst the crowd.
Your glance on me be it surprise, be it admiration, it ain't going to
stop my rhythm.
Because it's not your glance that made me dance, it's my heart of
youth.'
I simply cannot relate this girl to any of the 'dinosaurs'. But if she
really is a dinosaur, I am willing to let her have her fill.
Tye, my best pal unfortunately, noticed my little affair with
FlyNDance, and has been perpetually warning me about this.
"HELLO! You don't even know what she looks like, why take the risk??
Maybe she' is a guy!"
I can't blame Tye for his ignorance. Ever since he was dumped by Sally
in Secondary 4, he has become a renowned 'playboy'.
As the saying goes: "Once bitten, Twice shy".
In this case, after Tye was bitten, he has mastered the art of skinning
snakes alive, and make them into soup. But he got all the factors to be
a playboy, I always think he is the 19 year-old version of Brad Pitt.
Tall, handsome and got this tongue that causes diabetes in every women
he targets. I don't think he can even remember how many girlfriends he
has had.
I went online that night, log onto channel AJCRR and yes!
She is there.
Before I can get over the surprise and the daze, she sent me a message.
"Hey Slorr, so late liao haven't sleep ah?"
Now what? Now what? Ok ok, I had to calm down first. I swallowed hard
on my saliva, took a few deep breath.
Now where is that Tye when I needed him most at such crucial moment,
somebody to tell me what to say to her. How am I going to attract her
with my pathetic humor, which has gone stale.
"Slorr, me in a foul mood today. Can't sleep, you leh?"
MOTHER'S (direct translation to Chinese), what Slorr Slorr...
Now when I read it twice in a row, I am beginning to feel disgusted in
that nick Tye gave me. Tye said that: "Who knows, it might attract some
innocent gals in talking to you."
"I am not feeling very good too. So let's sad together."
Finally squeezed a sentence out, but I can already feel droplets of
sweat forming on my forehead. Actually I am not in a bad mood, I just
wanna follow up her topic that's all.
And if she ask for the reason for my feeling down, I can say:
"Since you are feeling down, how can I ever be happy?"
I know it sounds mushy, but Tye said: "MUSHINESS IS THE FUNDAMENTAL TO
ALL COURTSHIP."
And gals are a very weird species, they trust their ears far more than
their eyes. So instead of doing 10 things to impress her, why not just
say a sentence to move her.
"Ok, but you haven't greet me leh."
DAMNIT!.. how can I forget simple manners to gals. To think they call
me MR COURTEOUS' in school.
If this thing ever leaks out in school, I would lose all my female
fans.
'Nice to meet you, miss long-hair."
"I've been wishing that she's keeping long hair.
Tye said that:
"FlyNDance... hmm.. she would either be long-haired or a desperado,
'COs when gals dance, only 2 parts of them may fly: hair and skirt. So if
she doesn?ft has long hair, that means her skirt flies when she dances,
AH-HA!!.. this has a certain sexual hint in it...haha.."
"Eh? How you know I got long hair?"
BINGO! Heaven is on my side this time. It goes to prove that she is not
a DESPERADO. Yes!
"Not only that, I also know you seldom wear skirt."
I increased the stake, if I am correct this time, peace on earth
forever.
"Err... I guess you are right lor. But how you know one?"
"Just guess."
"Ok lor. Hey Slorr, tell you what, me tired liao, you coming online
tomorrow morning?"
"Ya, why??"
"Please please please say the you coming too, if not I am going to kill
myself for letting you go tonight. I'll see ya tomorrow at 10 am then.
Good night."
"Er.. should be today at 10 am.. ok.. good night too."
I just blurted out a last sentence ....Offline.
Suddenly I was so impressed by my performance just now.
But is the season of spring really arriving for me?? I
wish...............
Slorr, what a coincidence ahh"
"Yeh, I am not late."
"Ya lor, so qiao."
Girls are weird, I thought we already had an arrangement, why do I have
to pretend that its not.
They must have watched too many movies, and like to think that guys
they met due to the thing called 'fate' is the best thing that can happen
to their love life.
"Slorr, you talking nonsense lah."
"NONSENSE? Ok, let me tell you what is nonsense. Summer's beach, the
guy must be good at running, with broad shoulders, dark complexion with a
tint of redness, sparkling eyes and loud laughter.
Then he will call out loud the name of the girl, running towards her,
carry her and spin 3 rounds anticlockwisely."
"Slorr, you siao liaoz ahh?"
"I siao? Ok, let's change a location then. Deep in the mountains, the
guy must have long hair, gotta have the look of an artist, carries a
sketching stand, a few pieces of drawings, and you can see birds stop over
at his side admiring his work. And there will be a girl whose the
model, most probably naked."
"Slorr, but these all very romantic mah."
"ROMANTIC? Hello miss, romance only survive in novels and movies.
In real life, the guy on the beach may step onto broken glass or the
girl may be too heavy which tore his arm muscles.
Birds may just clear their waste on top of the guy in the mountains, or
he might get a thrashing from the girl because he comments on the
excess fats around the waist and hips."
"Slorr, you hate romance?"
"I hate romance? Nope, I am just using my knowledge of statistics to
get a deduction, that guys must be TALL to be romantic, not HANDSOME!!!
Some love novels even portrayed the guy as normal looking, but no-one
dares to challenge the height of him! I object, because I am not tall."
"?Slorr.... objection overruled..."
I think I am really outstandingly bo liao, talking to her about these
until noon.
"Slorr, are you hungry?"
"Ya, you leh?"
"Yes, guess its time for lunch...Slorr.."
"Then do you think we should?"
"Slorr, I am just asking. I don't intend to have lunch with you."
"Ok, good. I am not romantic, neither are you."
I had lunch with Tye, we talk about the conversation with FlyNDance
this morning.
"You moron. Told her you are not romantic, you siao ah? You have
disgraced me man. How can you make such a big mistake?"
"....I...I..."
Tye grabbed a chicken wing with chopstick, and I can see the trembling
of the hand and the wing.
"There are 3 'don'ts' in chasing a girl...
One, don't forget to be romantic;
Two, don't be too honest;
Three, don't be too stingy on the sugar in our speech.
In mandarin, we say 'nan ren bu huai, nu ren bu ai', you should know
this."
"This I know, but it has been a controversial topic over centuries.
Women aren't really that, cheap"
"So why would they only falls for 'bad guys' like me?"
"That's because 'bad guys' are usually romantic. Those 'nice guys' are
usually, dumdums. So she would rather choose a romantic 'bad guy'
rather than any of those dumdums. In math we call this 2C1, understand?
dumdum."
Oh, Tye is talking about math! Now I understand. No wonder I have
always been left on the shelf.
"In another words, gals wouldn't mind if you are not tall... if you are
not handsome... they can bear with your inconsiderate acts... can
forget your stupidity... but they can never forgive if you are not
romantic..."
"Come on, this is so exaggerating."
"Hey, most women have a 'knot' for romance, just like most men have a
'knot for virginity. To women they just can't understand how precious
the thin layer of membrane is to men. Same thing, men can't imagine how
important women treats romance."
"This is bullshit! How come I've never heard of that."
"The key word is 'knot', if you can untie it, fine. But how many had
actually succeeded in that. Practically none."
"Ok, fine. Now I've done it. So what should I do to remedy the
situation?"
"Face it. You are hopeless already."
I promise you I'll have a drink with you when you and her are over."
You SON OF A BXXCH.
Midnight. I am trying to concentrate on my physics notes...
F=ma, v=u+at...
It's really a wonder that nature can be explained by just a few
formulas and equations, and this we call science.
Then why is astrology and palmistry being labeled as superstitions?
Science should only be one of the ways to explain truth, what can't be
explained by science, it doesn't necessary mean that it's unreal....
Close to 1 am. Since I can't get anything into my head, I shall try my
luck on net then, maybe she is there.
"Slorr, you here."
"Finally, good night to you "
'FINALLY'? Strange word to use it here. What is she doing here at this
hour? Must be feeling down again.
"Yes, it is fate that brought me to you at this moment."
I am trying very hard to convince her that I am a bit romantic.
"Slorr, nothing to do with fate. I waited for you for one hour
liaoz..."
"Sure or not? For what?"
"Talk to you mah or else I can't sleep."
"You sick is it? Go see doctor lah "
"Slorr, let's continue our topic.
What do you think of relationships that began from the Internet?"
Oh my god, how should I answer her now?
"It's... it's very... romantic..."
Indeed I am not a good liar, even my words are shaking now.
"Slorr, you bluffing. You not romantic one mah."
GAME OVER. I am finished! No choice but to drink with Tye.
"Slorr, you lagging? Or just daoing me?"
"No, I am wondering why is the sky so chio tonight?"
"No no no. Don't try to shift the topic, Slorr."
Sigh. I give up. I asked for it myself.
"Actually I think relationships started from cyberspace is considered
as ROMANTIC, cos romance gives people an impression of unreal, and
cyberspace is virtual."
"Slorr, that's interesting."
"Surfers keep a safe distance from each other andusually 3 types of
people are produced in this way.
The first type....
The first type are those who present themselves on net with their
secondary personality'. Usually all of us consist of multiple personalities
and in everyday life, what we present to the world is the 'primary
personality', with the secondary one being suppressed, or maybe we don't
even realised this other trait of us deep inside. So Internet is the
place where this side of us is revealed, both intentionally or without
conscious knowledge."
"Is it true? What about 2nd type?"
"The 2nd type are those who will transform themselves into the kind of
man/woman he/she would want to be. There's bound to be 1 or 2
characteristics that you particularly admire, too bad, sometimes these
characteristics are just couldn't be found in you. Cyberspace is the perfect
location for this transformation to occur."
Slorr, you blowing cow, is it? Type 3 leh?"
"I am not blowing cow, I read it from an article of TIMES magazine!
Type 3 will be those who transform themselves into characters which are
impossible for them to become in real life.
For example, if you are a girl, you may act as a man on net. You may
even become BATMAN or SUPERMAN if you want."
"Hmmh.. That's pretty amazing."
"The first type is the 'faithful' type, 'cos its his own personality
that is being presented on net.
The 2nd type is the 'foolish' type, 'cos he knows only how to admire
others always forgets his own strong points.
The 3rd type is the 'pathetic' type, 'cos he is wishing 4 some
impossible."
"Slorr, then you belong to what type? Me leh?"
"I don't wish to believe you are type 3, 'cos I am not.
I crossed the possibility of type 1 'cos its too common, because I
think you are special. Being able to attract you, I think I am at least a
bit special. So we belong to type 2."
"Type 2, then who you wish to become? Slorr.."
I certainly would like to become a person like Tye, humorous, romantic
and eloquent, 'cos these are what I am lacking of.
"Slorr, what about me?"
"you? I don't know. you want to FLY and DANCE, probably that means you
wish to fully enjoy your youth while you can. But if this is something
you wish yet you can't achieve, then there's 2 possibilities:
1, you are aging, 2, you are leaving the world."
I think I said something wrong, cos she didn't sent me anymore message
after this. I began to blame myself for being so perverted, why talk
about these things?
I should have discussed with her whether ZOE or FANN, who should be the
queen of Caldecott Hill. #### that TIMES magazine! Poisons my mind.
Maybe she÷Õ lagging. So I waited... and waited. Girl, its just a few
minutes, but it felt like several hours. I want to apologize, but do not
know how to start, until she sent me this message:
"Slorr... let's meet..."
Without hesitation, I used the hand that I had used it over 18 years to
wipe my ass, typed 'O-K'.
I am supposed to meet FlyNDance tonight , 8pm, at the entrance of
McDonalds the one beside YMCA. That's the best time and place to meet a girl
you have never met before, according to Tye, 'cos they would have taken
their dinner by that time which means we can simply go inside the Mac
and have some fries and coke.
She will be wearing a whole set of coffee theme attire and I will be
wearing my usual blues, this is our way of identification.
She told me she is not those 'cute gals' I may think she is, I said
never mind, I am not
Brad-pitt either. Then she told me she has long ago given up on this
hope already.
"Slorr, you are early."
While I was idling, a girl tapped my shoulders from my back.
Although I was already mentally prepared for anything that's going to
appear in front of me, I was still astonished by this girl who stood in
front of me now.
If not for the coffee theme and that 'Slorr', I would think she is only
asking for directions. She is one of those 'chio bu' that can only be
found on Orchard Road, which I usually see while crossing the road.
Maybe I suffered from a serious concussion due to the heavy blow, my mind
was extraordinarily calm.
"Had your dinner right? I think we shall go inside the Mac first."
"You are pretty smart huh? A good way to save money indeed."
AIYA! She knows me so well, I can only give her an innocent smile back.
Since she's so pretty, I ordered 2 LARGE cokes, and even ordered TWO
packets of fries.
"This time you treat, next time I'll let you treat."
I am not falling for that, miss. But I am glad she mentioned 'next
time'.
"Slorr, are you disappointed when you saw me just now?"
DISSAPPOINTED? Are you drunk?
"Why do you think I will be disappointed then?"
"Cos I told you I am not cute mah, so you must be quite dissappointed
when you saw me"
She is making zero-sense, but I know she is just trying to hint that
she's actually cute.
"Then why did you have to lie that you are not cute?"
"Slorr. I said I am not cute. I didn't say I am not pretty."
#$%$##%^*&%$@!!!
"But you are also quite decent looking what it's not like what you
described to me too."
'DECENT'? A very vague word. To many gals, decent=boring. One good
thing is that she didn't lie to me about the fact that she is keeping long
hair. She also has a fair complexion which reminds me of HL milk I take
almost everyday.
It is now only that I found out she is from ACJC, but had spent her
first 3 mths in AJ.
Sitting in front of each other, we talk about many things. From her
obsession with coffee to my hobby of watching movies. BTW, she had
completely shook off my misconception of 'if she is pretty, she is brainless
She appears to be an attractive girl, both physically and character
wise, talking, smiling to me, occasionally being a little sarcastic and
nasty.
It's like a dream.
We left the Mac at around 10 pm. Since it's still early, I decided to
send her home and fortunately, it's just Ang Mo Kio, two MRT stops from
mine.
I would have second thoughts if she's staying at Pasir Ris.
"Slorr, congratulations! You are officially permitted to date me from
now on."
She said this before the lift door closed.
Back at home, I realized that I hadn't asked for her real name, maybe
it's the influence of that stupid Tye.
Tye told me:
Never ask a pretty girl her name the first time you meet her, cos there
are already too many wolves out there dying to know, so she will be
more interested in you if you act bochap.
Then why didn't she ask for mine? Don't tell me there's a female
version of Tye telling her not to?
It's again 1 am. Time to meet her in ajcrr.
"Hi! Slorr you tired?"
Of course I am tired after all the surprises she presented me, I would
go straight for my bed if not for her. But why is she here also? Isn't
she tired too?
Long time no see how are you?"
"Slorr you siao ah? 2 hours only leh... miss me?"
"A)Yes B)Of Course C)Abuden D)Dying to see you E)All of above. Answer
is E.
Seems like she is really tired, even the smiling face are yawning to me
right now.
"You wanna go for a movie tomorrow?"
Maybe I should ask her now, while she is half asleep, hoping that she
will blur-blurly click 'OK'.
"Should be no problem. What show?."
HOOOOORAY!! I am cheering for her fatigue.
"We decide what show tomorrow. Anyway what's important is watch with
who.
Not the show."
Tye's favourite line, I am just borrowing it.
"You should go sleep now lah."
"Wait one little while. You haven't tell me you tired or not?"
"Ok lah, A bit. You leh?"
"I am exhausted but have to say good night to you first. Slorr, if not
I can't sleep."
"Me too."
I can't believe I am doing this SILLY business right now.
"Ok I tell you what I count 1,2,3. Then we log off together."
"Ok good night Slorr."
"Same to you"
"1..."
"2..."
"3..."
I never talk whenever I am inside a cinema, and now is the best time
for my mouth to rest, so I spent the following 3 hours to admire this
much-talked-about movie of the century, Titanic.
I am not a romantic person, so it's perfectly understandable if I can't
really appreciate this motion picture fully, except for all those
stunning special effects. But something struck me when Jack said to Rose
before he sank into the deep.....
"Rose, listen to me... listen.... winning that ticket was the best
thing that had happened to me... it brought me to you....and I am thankful,
Rose.. .I am thankful...."
Suddenly I felt much fortunate than Jack, because I don't have to risk
my life to board Titanic, all I have to do is to switch on my PC every
night.
But he's one lucky guy too, because he knows how to draw, and just look
at how slowly he was drawing Rose, that made me blame myself for the
lack of this talent. But to her, this movie wasn't just about drawings or
special effects. I noticed that packet of tissue paper she was holding
in her hand. and just when Rose said: "I promise... I will never let
go, Jack... i'll never let go.."
She opened up her sling bag and here comes the reserve handkerchief.
#### that Celine Dion, why on earth did she had to sing that "MY HEART
WILL GO ON at the end of the show, for all the female species inside the
theater, its like "MY TEARS WILL ALSO GO ON".
"Ok, movie ended. Let's go."
I stood up, speak to her gently, worried that every single word I
breathe out might just crush onto her, and kill her. She continued to sit on
the position, looked at me with her beautiful eyes that just came back
from a swim.
After a while, she said "Slorr, movie ended, but life goes on. Am I
right?"
I nodded my head. But I just wished somebody might give me some clue of
what she was saying. Finally we managed to leave Orchard Cineplex,
since its still early, we decided to take a walk down the street.
Along the way, she seems unusually quiet. So I guess Tye was right
about the 'TITANIC FLU', he said that gals often got so mentally distressed
after watching this show, and it's the best time to launch an emotional
attack on her, that's why Tye had watch Titanic for over 5 times
roughly.
Her eyes were focused on the path or the crowds but I know her mind was
still left on Titanic, sinking with her, waiting for somebody to pull
her up.
I just kept my mouth shut. I know I am not a good swimmer. We walked to
Plaza Singapura. Suddenly she stopped in front of a Christian Dior
counter.
"Slorr, have you read a novel called 'Fragrance'?"
"Err..nope. Why do you ask?"
"Look at this 'DOLCE VITA' from Christian Dior. It's what the guy
bought for her girlfriend in the story on her birthday. And he told her
'DOLCE VITA is French, meaning 'SWEET TIMES'"
She pointed to a bottle of perfume at the counter, but I was more
interested at the price tag around the neck of the bottle.
"Oh... is it?"
"Slorr, then do you consider today as 'sweet times'?"
"At first I do, but some points are deducted since you started crying."
"That means it can only be considered a little bit sweet, I'll buy the
small bottle then."
I insisted to pay for the perfume as her birthday present from me since
I know her birthday is coming soon, this kind of saves me a lot of
trouble of finding a present for her. Luckily it's just perfume, or I would
have to pawn my underwear if that guy in the story gives her girlfriend
diamond or gold bar. . .
**continuing soon if anyone wans to read it. btw if anyone came across with the book called fragrance or the perfume named dolce vita mus tell me k. :) im a big addict to this fanfic.
