i saw her yesterday, not once, but twice.
submission of my model.
god dammit, i thought my model wasnt too bad before i stepped into the submission room, but when i saw the works done by the rest, i lost my morale and confidence in my own work.
trash it was.
i chose a very challenging topic to work on, and i did well for the first submission, but now, trash is all i've produced. no praises from lecturers anymore, and there's even someone who come and step on you when you fall, thank you MS. JQ. i guess as a person thought she's getting better than the rest, her pride and market value increases too. but seriously, i don't think much highly of your work, sorry to say this but this is ME.
if you think this is out of jealousy, dont bother, i will never jealous of you, you are too weak as my rival, speaking from the very bottom of my sincere heart.
the internal voice within me;
i am sick of competing with others, but this is how the world works.
all i want is recognition for the works i did, give me critics from your sincere heart, i dont need hypocritical remarks.
i need assurance, i need plenty of it, i need to get going, it's not the fame i'm after, for all i want i recognition and assurance.
and i am seriously stuck in this process, how do i move on to my final?
i know it was stubborn of me to heck advices and go on my own way, i just need to find where's my strength and weakness.
and now, at my weakness point, who will guide me to my strength?
i need guidance, to reach out to my goals.
